I think a bit about religion or religious experiences but I've never properly had one in a church or a temple or anything like that. I think the closest thing to a religious experience for me would be standing in my room in the middle of the day crying really feeling like I'm living to some piece of music or maybe driving around roundabouts singing at the top of my lungs with my friends in the dark not knowing whether to close my eyes and breathe in night or keep them open and fall in love with every star in my town's sky. I know I'll look back on now and remember it like I remember when I was 15, and every cigarette I can't roll properly and every song I've dumped before I let anyone else listen and every grown up thing I've learnt and done this year will be hazy, and I'll remember everything glowing and shot in soft focus. Like 'now' is perfect in the future and because I'm some kind of optimist the 'future' is perfect now or something. Maybe.
Anyway I guess I am thankful for the people and the times and the art and the supermarket catalogues that haven't let me fall back into that strange nostalgia vortex or completely away altogether because I wouldn't want to miss the nighttime drives or the mega chills of today because then what would I remember when I'm old? You can't really remember remembering.
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