Facey B

I'm so sorry I haven't posted in a few days. I've been wildly distracted by any number of, well, distractions, and haven't had a spare two seconds to myself to compose a post or do any of the other cool stuff I do on the internet (ie. refresh Facey B ten times then check my uni emails and look up my hypochondriac symptoms on Google and freak myself out). To be honest I've been feeling a little emotionally overwhelmed, in a nice good way. 


I like the idea of being hungry for something or someone. Tonight I was standing at my Aunty and Uncle's fridge, most greedily staring at pictures of their new little girls, so frustrated by how I couldn't look hard enough, or for long enough, without even so much as blinking becoming a chore. Their little beaming faces became more intriguing with every second more I saw them. 


And so I've been feeling as though I've been giving out little pieces of my heart again, and not ever for a second being frightened of its not being big enough, or strong enough, to love as much as is needed. 


I am amazingly, hopelessly romantic in every in-and-out breath that I take. I was talking to my Mum the other day and saying how it's practically a handicap; being so happily and giddily prepared to give out bits of me to another who's incomprehensibly, yet still seems to be, happy to take them. When hours are stretched so far away from each other, but then all of a sudden condensed again, and I'm finally OK with not 'achieving' things during the day, when, for the first time in a long time, I can quite safely say that I've giggled so much more than I've moped or been scared or nervous recently, or something, goodness me...


Don't get me wrong because I still get frightened by loud drinking and sad songs and the like - I just get the difference now, between thinking that you're completely alone, and knowing that you are so completely not.