I was going to tell you all about yesterday, yesterday, but I got home at like 1am and decided to sleep for a few hours before rising with the sun (impossible NOT to do in a bedroom with see-through curtains). So the below post is my latest verbal monstrosity called Amy Whining.
I went for a walk today with Lana Del Rey, trying to both clear things out of my head, and fill up time before an impromptu gig this evening. She is just wonderful, and I know a lotta people disagree. That's OK, I'm picking up what you're puttin' down, gurl!
Everyone's always like 'Oh yeah, I can see why you'd like her.' Which is interesting, because I can't really decide exactly WHY I like her myself. I do think she is probably one of the most beautiful women I have ever laid my eyes upon, and I'd like to say that I think that's beside the point (it's not, I love beautiful things - 'a thing of beauty is a joy forever')...I do love how DRAMATIC she is. I think that's got a lot to do with it. There's a moment in the Born To Die video where she's sitting on her throne with her crown of flowers and she just has the dirtiest, most spoilt-rich-girl expression on her face and to see such a perfectly proportioned, credit to evolution, piece of artwork of a human face, scrunched in such an ugly, pouty way...in the words of Holden Caulfield, that KILLS me. I'm not kidding.
Beautiful things that are ugly. I love that. Last night I was talking with my friend outside a pub, when everyone else was inside laughing and drinking and playing ping pong. We fed off each others' exhaustion and beer-moodiness and rolled cigarettes next to towering security guards, giggling hopelessly about the saddest things in the world. I'm very tired, of breathing in and out so fast, and it's so nice to feel the brick walls of our favourite beer garden on my stocking-ed skin, and two hands sweetly swallowing one of mine, and my best friend slowing breathing tumbles of smoke and clouds half-covering stars kind of like me when I get nervous; see-through and minuscule and flaky and forever away.
(The gig tonight is Woodstock-themed. Peace!)
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