Ranty depressants

So today is World Suicide Prevention Day, and at the risk of a) leaping onto a snowballing bandwagon and b) repeating myself, I just want to say like two things! I know lots and LOTS of perfectly beautiful, well-adjusted, hilarious, intelligent people who can't sleep at night. You don't have to wear a doctor's diagnosis around your neck to know when something isn't right, y'know, bearing in mind that being sad is different to actually having a mental illness, which is just as real as any other illness a body can get. But if the doctor has looked over at you from behind a clipboard and said the d-word, it's better to ask for help than to keep waiting for a problem to fix itself. Asking for help as in, more than just seeing a doctor one time, or a counsellor or something one time. If life has taught me one thing, it's that you have to work hard to achieve the things you want. And if it's taught me more than one thing, it's that training your brain to treat you kindly is something that you never stop working, and HARD, for. Your happiness might move in cycles, up and down, and that's natural as anything. But if you are depressed, or sad, talking helps. Forever. Always. Never shut up about your feelings (write in your diary though so you don't gnaw people's ears off). I rely on mine to write songs with.

Well now that's outta the way, Nebraskatak was played on PBS today! I had a little dance in the uni library when got a text saying so. Then I called my mum. It's pretty weird to know that we've been on those airwaves, poking our little heads into a pounding music industry. If you want to listen you can download here.

I've been listening to Ke$ha today, like seriously. It's pretty bad. I only like her sad songs. 

:( :( :( oh gurl

I really like the sentence while you were sleeping even though I'm like 97% sure I saw a One Direction fan fiction with that title around the darker side of the internet one cool Friday night at home in bed with Soda. I wrote a song with that title once but I can't for the life of me remember how it goes! Maybe a rewrite is in order. The idea of deciding something while someone beautiful is sleeping next to you is divine to me, and I think that's happened about three times in my little life so far. Watching someone you love sleep, curled under the same doona, sometimes so absolutely quiet you can hear your heartbeat and feel theirs, and getting that sudden clarity of things making sense, falling together. I no ur hearin' me Ke$ha.